I frequently get phone calls from friends who are looking for advice before they pop the big question.  The call usually starts like this: “Hey Fay, I have a question- I know that (insert name of potential partner) isn’t really in to diamonds, because of that whole Blood Diamonds thing, but I am pretty sure I need to produce the bling… You’re up on all that social stuff, got any advice?”

I have walked through the ring-purchasing process with several friends and know that there are many factors to consider.  Proposals are fundamentally about communicating your love to another person, so I always vote for doing something that is both you and reflects that you “get” your partner.  For many of my friends who work on human rights issues and are aware of the atrocities associated with the mining of diamonds and other precious metals, wearing a traditional diamond ring isn’t an option.

I have heard of people opting-out of all mined materials and carving their ring out of wood, one friends gave his now wife an engagement watch, and many people use jewelry that is in the family.  However, if family jewelry isn’t an option, and you think that wood might rot before your love does, then choosing a metal-based ring may be the way to go.

Below is an article written by DC-based Amanda Kloer of Change.org, which lists many of the sources that I have previously recommended to friends.  The list that Amanda provides isn’t exhaustive, but it’s a good place to start.  Hopefully you will find it helpful.

Where to Find Fair Trade Jewelry for Valentines Day

by Amanda Kloer Published February 12, 2010 @ 07:00AM PT – Change.org

If you’ve been watching any television the past couple weeks, then you’ve seen a major advertising boom by the jewelry industry pushing gold and diamond necklaces, earrings, and rings for Valentines Day. Aside from Christmas, V-Day (or National Solitary Awareness Day, as some call it) is one of the biggest holidays of the year for jewelry sales.

However, much of that jewelry is made from “dirty gold” and “blood diamonds” — terms used to describe gold and diamonds mined by children, exploited workers, and tied to violence and conflicts. But the good news is, there are a number of great places to buy Fair Trade gold and diamond jewelry without sacrificing quality. Here are some of my favorite Fair Trade and ethical jewelry resources:

Arctic Sparkle: They have a selection of fair trade and eco gold jewelry. The company is based in Minnesota and mines diamonds in Canada.

Artisan Wedding Rings: Offers primarily wedding and engagement rings, including gems and gold from small scale and family-owned mining operations in Africa. All precious metals are 100% recycled.

Brilliant Earth: Their diamonds come from Canada, where labor regulations are more worker-friendly than many parts of Africa, and where the diamond industry doesn’t fuel slavery or war. They also feature recycled gold in some of their products.

Pristine Planet: While they focus more on the sustainability and environmental impact of products, they do have a good selection of ethically-sourced diamonds and gold.

These are just a few suggestions to get you started, but the Internet is full of places to buy more ethical jewelry. And if you’re shopping at a jewelry store near you, ask lots of questions about where the diamonds, gold, and gems came from, and try and find a jeweler who offers some sort of guarantee that no slaves were used in the production of that piece.

As with all places you shop, I strongly encourage you to do your own research on these vendors and choose those which most closely reflect your values. If you’re looking for more information about blood diamonds, dirty gold, and where to find more ethical jewelry, here’s a How-to-Purchase-Ethical-Jewelry-Now on the subject.

Confused? Here is a post on TheKnot.com on some things to keep in mind when buying conflict free diamonds.  There many resources online to guide you through this process, so ask around! If you have come across other good resources, let me know and I will add them to this list.

The more customers demand slave-free and ethical products, the faster the industry will change.